For One Night Only...

Usually when an MP isn't an MP any more they take up a job as a consultant or a lobbyist or perhaps even as a non-executive board member. I think it's fair to say Lembit Opik was never a usual MP...so we probably shouldn't have assumed he'd be a usual ex-MP either.

This evening he'll be appearing as a stand-up comedian at Cafe Koha in Central London. £7 entry. I wish I could be there. Really I do.

Dewi Tri

Court summons, big tellys...and wigs!

And so at last the expenses scandal throws up a bit of light entertainment.

Surely the award for most extravagant/curious/intriguing claim must go to...you guessed it, the Honourable member for Montgomeryshire, Mr Lembit Opik!

Once again the Daily Sport's columnist, and one time star of Ant and Dec's Saturday night takeaway, has well and truly taken the biscuit:

"MPs' expenses: Mother of All Wigs for Lembit Opik's fancy dress" reads one headline on The Daily Telegraph's site today.

"Lembit Opik claimed £30 for two fancy dress wigs from Hamleys on his office expenses," we're told.

The Liberal Democrat housing spokesman submitted a receipt for the 'Mother of All Wigs', (£19.99), and a 'Filmstar Wig' (£9.99).

This of course comes after it was revealed he claimed for a court summons and tried to claim for a 42" plasma TV.

Now we all know how important it is to make an effort at these fancy dress parties. And I'm sure Lembit was carrying out some useful parliamentary duty at the shindig: a bit of networking here, a spot of lobbying there. All of which would have been seriously undermined without a thoroughly convincing and utterly impressive disguise.

There's nothing worse than turning up to an event dressed in jeans and a shirt when all the other guests are Marilyn Monroe, Darth Vader or Mickey Mouse (apart maybe from turning up to a party as the only one in fancy dress - Bridget Jones style - that is!).

In total a third of Welsh MPs have now paid money back. Find out more here.

What we'd like to know is which filmstar you think Lembit Opik was trying to resemble?

Send us your witty suggestions by the usual means!

Dewi Dau

For Sale

A day late but worth a translation nevertheless: Ar Werth by Vaughan Roderick.

"The general belief is that Lembit will lose Montgomery and another Liberal Democrat could win."

It was telling today that Kirsty Williams didn't disagree with that statement in her weekly news conference.

Kirsty also announced that every one of the party's parliamentary candidates will have to sign a code of conduct promising to repay any profit made by selling second homes in Westminster. Current MPs will be expected to follow suit. No current member will be allowed to stand if he or she refuses to sign. That includes any member who was elected in 1997 before the huge rise in house prices.

Is Kirsty quietly hoping someone will refuse to sign?

What does Lembit have to say? It's time for us to visit his column in the Daily Sport.

"All the same, the general mood is to portray us all as naughty people on the make. It's a shame. You'd probably like most MPs if you met them. It's also a shame that the actions of the Telegraph have not been properly scrutinised. I suggest you stick to the Sport. You know what you're getting, and, unlike the Telegraph's info none of the boobs are remotely dodgy."

Translation by Dewi Dau

Lembit's breakfast

A little gem from Vaughan Roderick's blog:

Why on earth do people not like poor Lembit? Al Murray the 'Pub Landlord' is the latest to condemn the Montgomery member according to the Times.

"If I don't ever have to interview Öpik again it would be too soon," Murray told Geoff Lloyd on Absolute Radio. "He was a bit of a twit. He came on thinking, 'I'll knock some lumps off this chap' and you sort of think 'that's not going to happen because we've spent all week sharpening this knife'."

It's unlikely Lembit will respond. He's too busy offering health advice to Daily Sport readers.

"Remember, you can't catch pig flu from eating pig meat. However bad things get, we'll still have bacon sandwiches."

Opi(k)nions

Here's Lembit Opik, Lib Dem MP for Montgomeryshire (and the Daily Sport's political columnist in his spare time), talking to Dewi Un at the weekend's party conference in Cardiff.

KW underestimates herself, he says. Is that accurate? She seemed pretty confident to us on Saturday! What do you think? As ever let us know!




Also check out this updated video interview with Eleanor Burnham where she talks about Twittering and neuro science!